When Moses Delivered Them From The Pharaoh
(Post Traumatic Slide Syndrome).
Home.
The threat of home hangs over these people every day. Every time these people enter a new world, whether we hear it or not, the question is asked: “is this our home?” And the more they never get there, the larger they realize this roulette wheel really is, and the more hopeless the journey becomes.
We, of course, know, that you can’t go home again. They’ve been gone so long (18 months, according to Rembrandt in this episode, which is actually kind of incredible) that they wouldn’t know home if they saw it, if it smacked them in the face.
So then what if they did make it home? What if the concept of home waltzed up and made it clear the journey was over? What would these people do?
“Post Traumatic Slide Syndrome” is a high-concept episode. Sure, you can have dinosaurs and you can have psychics, but this is something else— to have an episode where the plot is “the end.” Because for all intents and purposes, an episode where the sliders get home is the end of the show.
Look, everybody. There’s a (pretty short) list of episodes that pretty much everybody agrees are the best episodes of Sliders. “Luck of the Draw” is one of them. “El Sid” is not. This episode is one of those episodes that you’re supposed to absolutely love if you’re a Sliders fan.
Now it’s time for me to tell you how I came up with the idea for this blog: I watched this episode whilst high and thought it was the worst ever. The next day I was stunned— this is Sliders! My favorite show! What’s supposed to be the best episode! Is the entire show as bad as this? Answer: no, it’s not (mostly). More complicated answer: Post Traumatic Slide Syndrome isn’t that bad either.
But, in honor of my initial re-watch, I present this episode with the Time Again & World method of blog post— the ‘journal entry’ approach. This time I’ll augment it from time to time, as this is an episode that deserves at least a little bit of respect. But it’s also worth it to treat this ep with a bit of fun, no?
Sure, why not. Here we go:
-high concept- rembrandt in therapy!
All this episode is missing is a shot of the therapist playing tic-tac-toe.
-quinn’s mom thing
As in, they recast Linda Henning with a half-melted Auton.
-how cute they are! greatest hits of sliders, so cute so cute.
B F F Z // Q T Z
“to friendship” —SEE GUYS I WAS RIGHT
I’m also right about all the drinking they do.
full of nice scenes, slow pace at first, let them (and us) acclimate (to ‘the end’). oh hey, remmy hasn’t seen the batcave!
Rembrandt wastes no time making jokes about Quinn’s Penis.
keep it quiet. an interesting (and wise) idea
The rest of the episode is them watching TV and eating chips. Forever.
“all the things we’ve done, the things we’ve seen. it’s all because of you. thank you.” KISSY KISS KISSM KISS
NOM NOM NOM
also New Quinn’s mom is the WORST.
Like, did they hire her as a favor? She is the worst.
ha ha everyone is going to tell EVERYONE
Well, that took all of five minutes.
OH SHIT BETRAAAAYYYYYYEED
BETRAYED FACE ACTIVATED
DOLLA DOLLA DOLLA
GREED FACE ACTIVATED
WADES DIARY (bar scene)
Wade’s Diary, as in, “Here’s to Remembering that she has one.”
Quinn’s evidence: I’m a nerd/I’m a jerk
Seriously, it may as well have been “this dog I ran over with a car when I was 15 is still alive on this world.”
Well, now you’re being robbed, so no biggz/
FINISH HIM
Wade is SUCH a bizzy lady
Where is this loft/office? How does Wade afford it? Where does it come from? She had time to make all this happen? How long have they been here? NITPICKS!
Arturo’s press conference:
More like Arturo’s GRUMPY conference!
nice model i am sure you couldn’t turn it yourself, max
OH OKAY NOW I UNDERSTAND HOW THIS WORKS OF COURSE
Rembrandt spends his time at home RE-RECORDING HIS OLD HITS IDENTICALLY
I mean, I understand things like “budget” and “time constraints,” but this is a little ridiculous.
quiet moments without Quinn— character gold, right?
I mean, as long as no one is complaining.
LOL WORST STATUE EVER
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA
“The Father of Inter Dimensional Travel”
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA, pt. ii
LOL WORST WINDOW CGI EVER
But seriously, you’re pinning the entire episode on a piece of CGI this bad? Dudes, please.
“i’m nothing!” wait, IM nothing? that’s weird.
“Iceman” Mallory up in here.
Quinn is saying the right thing, but daaamn. (By this I am referring to how ridiculous Wade’s reaction is. Not the fact that she is upset that she is not home- that’s understandable. I’m really just bewildered about the “my career” bit. She really cares that much? Are these people so near-sighted and greedy that they’re more disappointed about cashflow than emotional stability? Food for thought, or not.)
man, WHYYYY is the professor such a DOUUUCHEEE
Number One Douche up in heeah!
YOU MUST DO WHAT YOU MUST DO
…in bed.
BUT THEN SO WILL I
…baby.
Whoa, Quinn lays it down: I’m not sure I can ever get us home.
Quinn admitting this is actually kind of a really really big deal.
SEE GUYS? GUILLLLT?
but wade is the nicest:
We’ll make it.
Wade Welles, breakin’ hearts again.
(Yeah, right)
Kudos for actually getting Maurice FIsh (and the pastor from Last Days? no wonder Remmy was so smug around him).
d be so nervous around FIsh, though.
Like seriously, I would be so worried the dude was going to try to gut me.
CRACK COMMANDO UNIT
I should really make a Sliders Drinking Game. New Rule: a shot every time they break & enter.
BUSTADDOOOOO
No one saw THAT coming.
OH SHIT REMMY U GOIN TO THA LOONY BIN
BUT REALLY WE SHOULD CALL THE COPS ON THAT HAIRDO
BFFZ
Bros.
CRACK COMMANDO UNIT PART TWO
sliders so crazy breakin people’s windows
SEE? It’s already two shots for breaking & entering (three if you count Alt-Turo stealing the Timer), and two for everyone drinking! We are so drunk now!
WUZZAT
URRR?
IZZAT A DAWG BARKIN
RRRUH-ROH!
a really big dog
Woof.
“of course” ha ha, when quinine says “Of course” he is the dumbest dude
“Of course” yourself!
“now I know how the isrealites felt when Moses delivered them from the pharaoh”
…right.
‘COS THERE’S A THRILLER IN (wade’s eyes)
OH SHIT OH SHIT
Shoot ’em from behind the shoulder, save them dollaz.
DOUBLE TROUBLE
Trouble Double?
OH MY OH MY
Is it cheaper not to focus or something?
WHOS WHO BATTLE OF THE BULGE (get it?)
Joe Smarm up in here.
Back and forth of knowledge!
This scene is just riveting.
…and HEADBUTT
FINISH HIM, pt. ii
“you better be the right one, man”
Peace out, bro.
like, really? this is all the looking into it they do? isn’t this a REALLY BIG DEAL?
and because WHY WOULD WE SPEND TIME DELVING INTO WADE’S PAST, her parents are no more than extras.
Because her non-character isn’t frustrating enough.
i hate quinn’s mom, guys.
I mean, I’m not trying to be mean (I sort of am, though), but what is wrong with her FAAACE?
BUMMER TAXI PUMP THAT MUSIICCCCC
Seriously, it might as well be “Eye of the Tiger” at this point.
OH SHIT ARTURO ON ARTURO
The worst CGI ever, pt. ii.
The worst CGI ever, part iii. (Seriously though really bad OOH NEW DRINKING GAME RULE)
“oh my god.”
No one ever mentions how he says “confound it” right before this.
and with those words, sliders fanfiction is born.
EXTEND THAT
and then, a funny little coda where the sliders break into the therapist’s office and make him CRAYZEE
like a robin’s egg.
Yeah, actually, it is “Robin’s Egg.” Sounds better than “Vortex Blue,” I guess?
Okay, so an addendum: we’ve had some crazy endings before (all roads lead to “Luck of the Draw”), and this one sort of plays down how insane it is. But we’ve got to stop (especially if you’ve never seen it before [and I’m assuming that at least ONE of you hasn’t seen the show before]). But we truthfully don’t know if the right Arturo slid with them. Sure, you can play shell-games and educated guesswork or just ask Tracy Tormé, but if you’re not that kind of fan, you’d be forgiven for freaking the fuck out.
And like I said, this is the moment Sliders fanfiction is born (slight hyperbole). Because if there’s an alternate Arturo who happens to be the real Arturo, then said Arturo would be having his own adventures trying to get home (one assumes). And, should something terrible happen to the Professor travelling with the sliders, then there’s a backup copy stuck on Azure Gate world. So, in a way, this Alt-Turo Shell Game amounts to an easy 1-Up. An extra life. We know he’s out there. Waiting.
I take it back. This isn’t a horrible episode. But what it represents is more important than what actually happens in it. It is, however, a fantastic example of the ‘anything goes’ approach to the show being an incredible success. This show doesn’t have to be either Dinosaurs or This— it can be both.
Next week: Like a Velvet Fog Plugged with Lead (Greatfellas).
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